Borderline Personality Meets the Customer Service Agent

I’m self employed. As an internet marketer, I advertise products on my websites, collect a commission, and then get paid the following month on or around the 15th. The problem is, many companies in my industry take A LOT of latitude when it comes to making timely payments. In most instances I don’t pocket earnings from the previous month until sometime between the 20th and 25th of the NEXT month. Inevitably this creates financial pressures and frustration because I’m not a millionaire and need every penny I earn to pay the bills. The medical costs associated with ongoing BPD treatment and Type 1 Juvenile Diabetes are outrageous.

I frequently have to be the “squeaky wheel that gets the grease”, and when getting my grease I’m often half BPD raging at the same time. I get very agitated waiting for my paycheck to come when it’s running late, and if I have to contact the company and complain, I’m usually pissed off before I’m on the phone or typing an email. For whatever reason, Borderline Personality Disorder and confrontations with poorly trained customer service agents end up producing copious amounts of angry words, screaming, fist pounding, and insults.

I’m currently dealing with a company that is over one month late sending me $915. The bank wire was supposed to clear a week before Christmas, but due to their complete and utter incompetence, it has yet to arrive as of the date of this post. I realize you are probably visualizing me stepping up on my high horse, much like those snotty customers at restaurants who are extremely demanding and then tip their waiter only 10%. Well, I’m definitely NOT snotty or demanding; I just expect to get paid on time, all the time. It’s not too much to ask of large businesses with millions of dollars in their bank accounts. (By the way, I used to be a waiter and I nearly always tip 20% or more when out to eat)

Today my anger with this particular company boiled over into a partial BPD rage.

First, I contacted my account representative (for the fourth time this week 🙂 ) reminding him that my payment had not arrived. As my BPD fury started to ignite, I wrote a nasty email berating his company for its stupidity and inability to keep its own word. My anger continued to increase even after hitting my email “send” button, so I went into phase 2 of my “BPD customer service rage”.

I made a b-line to the actual company website, found the instant chat support page, and started hammering the representative with strong language, insults, and threats. Their excuse for their inability to pay on time was due to “delays associated with the holidays”. Now I’m fully aware banks and other financial institutions take Christmas and New Year’s day off and that work days preceding and following these holidays are light and usually understaffed. That excuse would work if I was complaining on December 26th. Today, however, is January 26th, and I don’t know a single bank in the world that takes the entire month of January off and ignores its customers.

I gave the chat representative a tongue lashing a la my keyboard, and gave him/her my phone number and dared them to call me :). They didn’t call (no surprise) and stubbornly held on to their lame story that the holidays and “volume of transactions” slowed payments. Sorry, I don’t buy it, not even for a nanosecond.

Just before closing the chat window, I threatened to cease advertising campaigns I launched on their behalf unless I received my payment in four hours. I thought maybe this would stir them a bit (since I’ve sent them over 450 customers over the past couple years), however four hours later my bank account balance was no different than it was when I woke up this morning.


My last words were, “I demand immediate follow up on this matter by email” (because they had never emailed me once over the past month-plus explaining their delinquency), and I pounded my fist on the table closing the chat window.

Five minutes later, I got a form email from someone with a fake name asking me if my payment had arrived yet. NO IT HAD NOT. Of course, the amount they quoted in the email due to me was $530, not the $915 I was promised by my account representative. It’s clear these idiots are spending my money either on crack or trained monkeys to type form letters on their behalf.


I replied to their sh*tty email with more insults and harsh words for their quality of customer service. I finally reminded them that I have given them steady business and was appalled that I was being ignored like some beggar working a street corner. I concluded my email stating they would “lose my business” unless I received payment immediately.

Of course that payment and an actual customized email response never arrived.

I knew I was about to rage because I could feel my brain “tightening” and my blood pressure rising (literally). When I’ve had full blown BPD blowouts, my head literally pounds and I often find my ears ringing afterwards. I also typically feel tense, extremely agitated, confused, and unable to continue going about the business of my day without a LONG timeout.

Today was no exception: I simply yelled “F*ck it!”, and took a nap.

To all customer service agents: Roughly 3% of the population has BPD and we hate being screwed over. That means 3 out of 100 calls with BPD people will probably end up as training material for how to deal with irate customers. Make sure you don’t throw gas on the fire by making up stories, poor excuses, or outright lying for your company’s incompetence. Instead, speak to us BPDs on a personal level and try to calm us down or else you’ll be in for a nasty, hate filled schooling from a person with mental illness 🙂 .

To those with BPD contemplating screaming at customer service: Support reps are human too. Give them a reasonable time to respond to your queries. If you get no response, or they don’t keep their word, write a firm email requesting the matter be resolved, or call reminding them they need to help you. Wait, and then send a second reminder. Delay as long as possible before detonating into a BPD rage, because things might not be the same afterwards. The poor customer service agent on the other side might decide to leave their job: and if they’re working for a piece-of-crap company, you’ve helped them make the best decision of their life 🙂 .